So if this is what is supposed to be candy mountain of the better locations for me, then well fuck. I can not express how much I deeply hate small cities or any varieties of that thing. I am so deeply rooted in the belief now that I either need to move away after my year of leasing my apartment is over or just run away. Only the big kid form; with still bill payments, and moving issues, among other things. Believe it or not from personal dealings with me, but I swear to any comic powers that may be if one more brain dead fucking nit wit makes the passing comment of 'Omg dude what the fuck was that?' or 'Faggot' or as many others you can think of. I have also heard 'disgusting' which I thought was a pretty nifty level of crappy people have seemed to reach all on they're own.
And in all seriousness if I hear any of those words again I will either hit the person over the head repeatedly with a heavy object until they become a vegetable or a mental ill person; that or quite my job and hide in my room. I may not leave it ever again, I may just stay in it, and rock myself into a state of pure insanity. You think with my years of dealing with the crap I would have just learned by now to stick up for myself and say something or at least deal with it better...but no. If anything my sureness of making others pay for it becomes more valid every day. Or is it my sureness in me becoming a held up apartment lurker that needs to be hauled out in a straight jacket.
All this coupled with my own possible gender issues it all compiles into a huge heaping wad of ultra crap. The best of the best really. What I for see around the corner is who I am dying and being replaced with what society has figured I should be. Sad as that image is, it seems to be the easiest answer I can find right now...
Fox out.
ps forgot to mention how much I hate people.
